I am learning that Jesus loves me.
(you would think I already know...since the Bible tells me so...)
I used to know He loved me.
And I am beginning to know again.
Not just hope. Not just wish. Not just pretend.
But KNOW. that Jesus. Loves. Me.
My heart and my mind are beginning to come together on this subject. My heart has known the truth all along. I couldn't give up the belief that God loved me and really desired good things for me as His child.
But my mind wandered. My mind doubted. My mind started trying to piece together all the hard things that started happening over and over and over and it eventually came to a belief that maybe Jesus didn't love me that much after all.
And, without realizing that my mind was believing that, I began to approach my life as if that was true. It was when I began to evaluate my actions and the way I thought about myself that I began to realize what I believed about Jesus' love (or lack thereof) for me.
After much wrestling in my own strength, after some honest conversations with close friends and family, and after walking in obedience to truth even when I am unsure, I am beginning to feel God renewing my mind.
He is opening my eyes to His love. He lavishly poured love on me this weekend. And He is giving me the ability to see things through the filter of His love.
This is the love that I used to walk in. But as I rediscover it, it feels so NEW.
Perhaps it is because I had never known what it was like to live without His love before.
Now, after experiencing what it feels like to walk in a way that doesn't accept His abundant love for me, I am more grateful and more thirsty for His love than ever before.
What about YOU? Are you experiencing God's Love? Or do you struggle with believing He loves you?
I have struggled with it a lot.
ReplyDeleteI think I had to realize that I didn't have to perform for God or meet his standards He put in the Bible... I am me. God made me the way I am. And he loves me.
And the more I focus on his LOVE the more I want to please him. The more I focus on his WILL, the more I fail and get confused.
I think that's a really interesting part of Christianity. :)
I have definately struggled, this past year, with believing that God really loves me. I have asked myself, how could God really love me if all these terrible things happen to me and the people in my life? I have not always received a solid answer but more of an assurance that God's love is not based on my feelings or on life's circumstances, but on his character. He is love!
ReplyDelete@Jenn: Yes, I totally understand how you feel Jenn! I LOVE what you said..."His love is not based on my feelings or on life's circumstances, but on His character. He IS LOVE!" So good :-)
ReplyDelete@Anonymous: Thanks for commenting and sharing :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, it is a delicate balance of knowing that the Lord loves us for who we are, faults and all. "He knows our frame and that we are but dust..." Psalm 103:14
But He also says in John 14:23 that those who love Him will keep His commands. There should also be effort on our part to obey the Lord and those "standards" he has placed in His Word.
So, it's the balance of knowing that what we do doesn't earn our love from the Lord - He loves us for who we are. And then also knowing that from our hearts of love towards the Lord, we should seek to obey Him to the best of our abilities...
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! :-)