Post-Thanksgiving Post.

Well, life is back to normal. And for me, it happens to be a peaceful normal instead of the busy and stressed normal that I used to constantly find myself in. I am SO thankful for that.


My Thanksgiving Day was wonderful! Adam and I spent the day with his side of the family. We don't see the extended side of his family very often so I am always happy when I get a chance to see them and become more acquainted with that part of his family.
We also had a new treat this Thanksgiving. Adam's parents decided to "adopt" two Marines for the day from the base at Camp Pendleton. The city his parents live in puts together a whole event for these young soldiers - most of whom are having their first Thanksgiving away from family. It was so nice getting to know about these boys families and hear what military training has been like for them. That have quite the stories to tell! A wonderful blessing was to discover that both our marines were Christians and it was amazing to hear how God has been working in their lives while in training.



The Day-After-Thanksgiving was wonderful as well. The day-after-Thanksgiving has become a very important holiday in my family. We have TONS of traditions which include (but are not limited to) bagels, Starbucks, Hide-and-Go-Seek at the Christmas tree farm, decorating my parents house, TONS of pictures and filming, first sip of eggnog, teddy-bear ornament name draw, and the list goes on....
We had an amazing day and decided to finish the evening by watching some recently converted-to-DVD home videos. So Fun!

The picture is of me and Adam at the Christmas Tree Farm.





The long weekend ended with the grand finale of my sister's Junior Voice Recital. She is a vocal major at Long Beach State and is So. Incredibly. Talented. She was incredible! It was an hour of music sung just by her (well, one guy sang a duet with her) and she did an amazing job. She sang in a beautiful old chapel in Los Angeles and her voice left me with chills and tears throughout her whole performance. Her encore, "Great is Thy Faithfulness" was dedicated to our grandparents and she left the audience in rapture. I had the privilege of being the recital announcer which was fun until it resulted in my most embarrassing moment EVER. I don't think my cheeks have ever been so red!



All-in-all, an incredible weekend. What is also incredible is that, because of the peace I am experiencing in my daily life, I'm not too sad about watching a holiday pass. It was fun and wonderful and memories were made, but I am also enjoying the quiet and the calm of my daily life. I am thankful that I am learning how to have boundaries and to order my days in a healthy way for myself. That is something I am definitely thankful for during this post-Thanksgiving week.


What about YOU? How was your weekend?

Thank You, Dad.

As I laid in bed last night, my head on the pillow and my body curled on it's side, I couldn't stop coughing. All I wanted was to sleep and allow the rest to heal my throat but the sinus drainage just would not ease up.

As I laid there, I tried to figure out a way to get the coughing to stop so that I could fall asleep. And as I laid there thinking, my mind was transported to many years ago.

In my mind's eye, I saw a nine-year-old strawberry blond girl, lying on her Ikea bunk-bed with the built-in desk underneath. I saw a six-year-old girl surrounded by stuffed animals and clasping a floppy golden dog and a stiff blue bear and lying on an identical Ikea desk/bunk bed. The whole top perimeter of the room was bordered with kitty ballerinas in shades of pink and grey. The room was lit up by the glow of a fishtank and the only sound to be heard was the rhythmic breathing of the six-year-old and the incessant coughing of the nine-year-old: me.

I'm sure there were many nights growing up when I couldn't stop coughing. But I specifically remember this one. I remember my dad coming in (he always took the late night shifts when we needed something as kids) and propping me up with a bunch of pillows. He said that I would sleep better propped up because it would help my sinuses drain and help me not to cough.

Then he gave me Saltine crackers. I don't remember the exact wording of the reason he gave as to why Saltines work but I remember it being something like, "the crackers soak up the phlegm." He stayed with me while I ate a few and the coughing subsided. After I was settled, he left me with a half-full bag of saltines, "in case you start coughing in the middle of the night."


Then he left me with another goodnight prayer and kiss on top of my head.


So last night, after remembing that night from many years ago, I rolled out of bed. I went to my kitchen and grabbed the box of whole wheat crackers - the closest thing I had that resembled Saltines. Then I grabbed a cushion off the back of my couch and headed back to bed. I propped myself up the way my dad did and I munched a few of the crackers to stop the coughing - and then I munched a couple more because they tasted good.


Within five minutes, I was asleep.


And now,

I want to say thank you.


Thank you, Dad.

Thank you, Dad, for being such a loving, hands-on dad. Thank you for your gentle touch with all your daughters and for being so understanding when we were sick. Thank you for still being that way now. Thank you for your example; it has taught me a lot - especially when it comes to falling asleep with a sinus cough! ;-) Plus so much more.

I love you.

My Heart Is In H.B.

I belong here.

Whenever I come here, I feel like I'm home. Known. I know myself best here.

Just like the smell of freshly brewed coffee when I walk into my parents house, the smell of the long and soft green grass on the north side of the HB pier welcomes me home. It's as if the scent of the grass is saying,
"Hey Heidi! Good to see you again. Sit! Soak it in. Relax! Welcome home."

So I do.

And here I am.

A blown wish-flower stem lays next to me - the seeds already scattered by my big blow with all the breath I could muster.

Perhaps that why I feel like I belong here. So many wishes have been blown here by me during the course of my life. I am sure some of those wishes have taken root in this grass.
Perhaps I've recycled my wishes and have blown the same wishes I have helped to grow here. Blowing and Planting. Blowing and Planting. My wishes keep growing here in HB.

As I lay in this wish-sprinkled grass, I see an unoccupied picnic table to my far left. But in my mind's eye, there is much activity at that table.

In my mind's eye, My Grandma Clarice is spreading out a plastic, red-and-white checkered table cloth. It catches in the wind and my nine-year-old self runs to catch the corners and help her lay it down.

We all carry down the food and most of us are wearing over-sized Michigan sweatshirts. My mom holds my newly-born sister tightly bundled in a blanket. I switch between being a mature daughter helping with the dishes to being a pony-tailed girl who wants to roll down the hills with my six-year-old sister.

After a couple hours, it starts to get windy. My grandpa warns that we shouldn't be out when it is cold and damp. My mom rallies us up and my dad loads the car. I soak every last bit of the wind that I can before I get in the car and stare out the window at the ocean.

I blink....and I'm back to reality.



As I'm laying on this ground where I've planted my wishes, I realize that my sometimes-wish of going back in time can only happen in the fond remembrances of my mind.

But the gentle swirling breeze around me and the rhythmic roar of the ocean before me reminds me that my future lies in forward motion. The whisper seems to say to me,

"It is good to know where you've come from. Be thankful for your roots, embrace your foundation, smile at your memories.

But live in the now.

And, without rushing, anticipate your future with joy.

And in this moment, laying on a bed of grass and childhood wishes,

Be Glad."

This post was first written in my journal, on a beautiful Sunday early-evening, in Huntington Beach, CA

You're Gonna Miss This.

Last week, one of the members of our church life group was house-sitting for her sister and she offered to host our weekly gathering at her sister’s place.

So, [fifteen-minutes-too-late] Adam and I jumped in our super-clean [thanks Adam!!] Explorer and drove down to a city we haven’t been in for almost two years. It was the city where we started our married life together.

The house we met at that night was just a couple blocks away from our old church where we used to spend SO much of our time. It was also just a very short drive away from our first (and second) apartment.

So, after our life group ended, Adam and I decided to drive down to our apartment.

It was so weird.

We hadn’t been back to this area since we had moved into the town home we bought in November 2008. There just hadn’t really been any reason to go back.

Driving to our old apartments, we passed by the CVS that we would always stop at for daily necessities.

We passed the Brueggers Bagels that we always looked forward to eating at right before church on a Sunday morning. It was always two cheese jalapeno bagels for Adam and one try-something-new-every-time bagel for me.

We passed the El Pollo Loco, Rubys, Starbucks, Baja Fresh, and Rubios that we had eaten in so many times enjoying a date with one another or a time of fellowship with our friends from church.

We passed the park and movie theater where we had gone street witnessing with the group from church. And where we had played Frisbee and Smash-Ball on a summer night.

And then we entered our apartment complex. We drove in the same entrance we used to always use. First, we drove over to our one bedroom. Then we drove over to the other side of the complex to where we had our two bedroom.

Had it really been almost two years since we in that complex? Together, we talked and talked about details that we remembered.

Things we did in specific places.

Conversations we had and the exact locations we had them in.

Trips to the laundry room.

Driving around late at night trying to find a parking lot.

Carrying my piano up those stairs.

Remembering what our place looked like inside.

I didn’t know it then, but we were building memories.

I mean, I knew that one day I’d remember those days but, in that first year, I never really stopped to realize the preciousness of each day and the fact that I would cherish those memories in the future.

Back then, I was too focused on building.

Building our marriage. Building our relationships. Building and keeping up with all our activities. Getting ahead in school. Building for the future.

I never realized I would miss that time of life. I occasionally would tell myself I would. And I’d sing along in the car to the country song, “You’re Gonna Miss This” and remind myself to open my eyes a little more.

But I didn’t actually believe it.

Now I do.

But from that experience, this is what I have learned.

Cherish today.

Ok, so things aren’t perfect. I still have to finish painting my less-than-halfway painted walls. I still have to get my piano tuned. I still have to do this. And that. And this other thing. And that other thing.

That’s ok.

I’m gonna miss these days someday. I don’t realize it or think about it enough, but I am building memories NOW.

Our first year of marriage, I was just living. Every-day-daily-life living. And now, those daily-life-days are memories. Beautiful memories.

And my today will, someday, be a memory.

At this point of my post my parents are probably reading and smiling to themselves saying, “Finally, she is realizing this! Hopefully she is actually getting it!”

My parents know very well that I have a tendency to always look ahead to the next thing. Ever since I was a young child I wanted the next stage of life. When I was in junior high, I just wanted to get to high school so that I could prepare for college. Two years into college, I was married.

My mom has always said to me that I am her “April Child Dreaming of June.” (lyrics to a song about always dreaming of the next stage of life.)

I’m going to [try to] start allowing my mind to slow down. Maybe my pace of life won’t slow down. But I want to be more aware of soaking up my days and enjoying the little blessings and even the struggles that life is offering me today.

I want to take more pictures.

I want to write and journal about my daily experiences.

I want to steal those hidden moments to embrace it all.


Because tomorrow, today will be a memory.


This song below PERFECTLY describes me. Minus the arrival-of-children part. That is the one part of the song that hasn’t quite happened. Yet :-)

And, for all you who pretend you don’t like Country Music, this song is going to bring out the truth. After listening to this song, there is no denying that Country Music is awesome.

Three Years!!!

Today, I have been married three years!

Three years ago, I was getting my make-up done by my mom, having my mom's best friend do my hair and all my sister's hair, and I almost didn't get to my wedding on time! It had something to do with a car breaking down with my best friend, most of the bridesmaids (my sisters) and the bride (me) in the car. That fiasco included nice men at the gas station helping us fix my friends car while my husband-to-be raced down the freeway 40 miles away to save me from the "evil" man with the chocolate milk. (who my friend and I still think was an angel in disguise.)

Point is, I made it (although a little late) to the little, old-fashioned church in Orange, Ca.

There is so much to say about that wonderful morning three years ago. It would take more than quite-a-few posts to fully describe all that I experienced and remember from that day.

But here are a few things I am thinking about today:

The feeling I had when I heard the music start to play for me to walk down the isle. That feeling was SO incredible and quite too impossible to describe. During my walk down the isle, it felt like time literally slowed down for me so that I could absorb every face, every emotion, every tear, every smile, and every flutter inside my heart. It. Was. Wonderful.

Walking out of the church with my new husband and realizing we had absolutely no clue what to do next. We hadn't rehearsed that part! So we just stood there watching everyone come out of the church until we were wisked away to go sign our marriage license.

Dancing with my dad. I had always looked forward to that and it was so special.
Watching Adam dance with his mom and realizing "that man is my HUSBAND!"
And, of course, dancing with Adam, as his wife.

Leaving our reception, and being so hungry that we pulled through the Burger King drive through down the street still dressed in the tux and wedding dress. Too bad we didn't realize that there was SO much delicious chicken left over at the reception.

Being stuck in traffic on our way to San Diego and getting TONS of honks because of our Just Married flags.

Getting to our hotel in San Diego and......enjoying ourselves. ;-) Room service was AWESOME! My honeymoon is where I learned to love eggs benedict and where I first got to enjoy Adam's awesome jet-ski skills.

Yay for Marriage!

What, if you are married, are some of your favorite memories from your wedding day? Or, if you aren't married, what are you looking forward to the most?