At church on Saturday, we took a week break from our chronological study through the gospels and went through the passage of Hebrews 12:1-3.
(Click here for the powerful message by guest speaker Pastor Brent)
"Let us lay aside every weight...and run this race with endurance...looking unto Jesus..."
We dove deeper into the passage last night at small groups and went over some of these questions as we reviewed our lives in light of the scripture:
-Evaluate the components in your life and ask yourself, "Is it a wing or a weight?"
-How do you endure the obstacles you are facing?
-How do you walk alongside others when they need the strength to endure an obstacle?
-How do we endure in this race and stay focused on the goal of the ministry of reconciliation?
We talked about how even good things can be weights in your life if it is not helping you grow toward the purpose God has for you in your season of your walk with Him.
But HOW do we make these decisions? HOW do we find the strength and motivation to endure our current or future trials during this race of our Christian life?
We cannot do it in our own strength- in ourselves, we do not contain the ability.
That is why the writer of Hebrews wrote these two powerful phrases of instruction:
"Looking unto Jesus..."
and
"Consider Him..."
The power of knowing Jesus and spending time with Jesus and seeking Jesus cannot be overemphasized. It is not part of the process.
It IS the process.
It is reading His Word so that we know what He has endured, and what He has said, and what He has done.
It is spending time at His feet in prayer and seeking His heart.
It is grabbing members of your fellowship and praying together with them.
It is receiving His Spirit and being empowered by Him. (Acts 1:8)
It is seeking Him in ALL things.
It is asking for His perspective in ALL things.
It is surrendering to His care and His will.
It is "looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was before Him (that's us!) endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God."
He has already won the victory! So today, this week, in our lives, let's bring Him into everything.
Consider Him.
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Rest Well, My Friend
My Friend, you are doing a good job.
A good job.
Let me gently remind you of this.
It is good to rest.
It is purposeful and you are accomplishing much by resting.
I love you so much, my friend. Your ambitious heart and your capable hands have accomplished much and accomplished it well. You have brought much glory to the Lord through your obedience of action and through your ability to steward well in a short amount of time the gifts that He has entrusted you with.
But your actions have never made Him love you more.
And your abilities have never given you more worth.
You know this, my friend. You know that all your worth is found in your identity in Him. You yourself have encouraged me well in this.
Allow yourself the space you need. Take the time to just sit - to feel. He has called you to rest - you glorify Him by obeying Him. He is your Heavenly Father - He cares for you. He knows intimately the details of the season before this time of rest. And He knows how He is preparing you for what lies after this time of intentional stillness.
And yes, my friend, it is intentional. There is much purpose in it. I know how much you like to feel purposed and accomplished. Remember that God has called you to this season intentionally. You know some of the reasons. Some of the reasons are a mystery that God is working out.
Take the pressure off yourself. Let your commitments change as needed. Let your standards change as needed. Ask yourself, "What is the highest priority between me and God right now?"
And if that priority is sitting by the fire, journal by your side and pen in your hand, and thinking and dreaming of the thoughts in your heart right now - then with full intention - take the time to do that.
Rest my Friend,
and Rest Well.
A good job.
Let me gently remind you of this.
It is good to rest.
It is purposeful and you are accomplishing much by resting.
I love you so much, my friend. Your ambitious heart and your capable hands have accomplished much and accomplished it well. You have brought much glory to the Lord through your obedience of action and through your ability to steward well in a short amount of time the gifts that He has entrusted you with.
But your actions have never made Him love you more.
And your abilities have never given you more worth.
You know this, my friend. You know that all your worth is found in your identity in Him. You yourself have encouraged me well in this.
Allow yourself the space you need. Take the time to just sit - to feel. He has called you to rest - you glorify Him by obeying Him. He is your Heavenly Father - He cares for you. He knows intimately the details of the season before this time of rest. And He knows how He is preparing you for what lies after this time of intentional stillness.
And yes, my friend, it is intentional. There is much purpose in it. I know how much you like to feel purposed and accomplished. Remember that God has called you to this season intentionally. You know some of the reasons. Some of the reasons are a mystery that God is working out.
Take the pressure off yourself. Let your commitments change as needed. Let your standards change as needed. Ask yourself, "What is the highest priority between me and God right now?"
And if that priority is sitting by the fire, journal by your side and pen in your hand, and thinking and dreaming of the thoughts in your heart right now - then with full intention - take the time to do that.
Rest my Friend,
and Rest Well.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Three Months
For twelve Tuesdays in a row, a group of between 8-14 ladies gathered every week to study the book of Daniel.
In my home.
As we got to the end of our last gathering last night, ladies began thanking me for hosting it.
"Thank you!"- I wanted to tell them - "You don't know what joy it brought me!!"
For over 5 years, every since I've been married, it has been my desire to host Bible study in my home. But with both my husband and I being a full time students, working full time, moving 3 times, and having almost continuous construction in our current home over the last few years, the timing just hadn't worked out.
That is, until these past three months - a joyful three months! Three months of Tuesday being my favorite night of the week.
Three months of women sitting on couches given to me for free, talking around a table that was given to me for free, and watching Beth Moore teachings on a TV given to me for free. And three months of women not caring how or where I got my furniture - but simply gathering on and around it to engage in fellowship.
Three months of women sitting on the floor because there wasn't enough spots on the couches and three months of washing their hands and putting their purses in a restroom that still has yet to be fully completed from our construction.
Three months of women bringing snacks and sipping coffee and of sharing tears and laughs and prayer needs and three months of watching God answer those very prayers! Three months of learning one another's hearts, and lives, and needs and learning to pray over those things for each other.
Three months of studying hard and of learning that scripture is not always about us but it is always for us! Three months of learning that we are capable of understanding more than we think we are and of applying ourselves to be diligent to learn God's Word.
For three months these women came - despite the imperfections of the house, despite the imperfection of each other, and even despite the imperfections in themselves, they came and gave of themselves. And they accepted each other. Embraced each other. Loved each other.
So to my Bible study ladies, my sisters, thank you!!
I feel like my house has now been christened! Hosting Bible study has made my little house finally feel like home to me. I feel like I belong more to my home now that it has been a place of gathering for us women to grow more in the knowledge of the Word and in unity with each other.
You have all been a part of bringing one of my biggest desires come to reality!
I love you all and am full of joy and thankfulness as I reflect on our three months together.
In my home.
As we got to the end of our last gathering last night, ladies began thanking me for hosting it.
"Thank you!"- I wanted to tell them - "You don't know what joy it brought me!!"
For over 5 years, every since I've been married, it has been my desire to host Bible study in my home. But with both my husband and I being a full time students, working full time, moving 3 times, and having almost continuous construction in our current home over the last few years, the timing just hadn't worked out.
That is, until these past three months - a joyful three months! Three months of Tuesday being my favorite night of the week.
Three months of women sitting on couches given to me for free, talking around a table that was given to me for free, and watching Beth Moore teachings on a TV given to me for free. And three months of women not caring how or where I got my furniture - but simply gathering on and around it to engage in fellowship.
Three months of women sitting on the floor because there wasn't enough spots on the couches and three months of washing their hands and putting their purses in a restroom that still has yet to be fully completed from our construction.
Three months of women bringing snacks and sipping coffee and of sharing tears and laughs and prayer needs and three months of watching God answer those very prayers! Three months of learning one another's hearts, and lives, and needs and learning to pray over those things for each other.
Three months of studying hard and of learning that scripture is not always about us but it is always for us! Three months of learning that we are capable of understanding more than we think we are and of applying ourselves to be diligent to learn God's Word.
For three months these women came - despite the imperfections of the house, despite the imperfection of each other, and even despite the imperfections in themselves, they came and gave of themselves. And they accepted each other. Embraced each other. Loved each other.
So to my Bible study ladies, my sisters, thank you!!
I feel like my house has now been christened! Hosting Bible study has made my little house finally feel like home to me. I feel like I belong more to my home now that it has been a place of gathering for us women to grow more in the knowledge of the Word and in unity with each other.
You have all been a part of bringing one of my biggest desires come to reality!
I love you all and am full of joy and thankfulness as I reflect on our three months together.
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Rest for Today
It's been an amazing year so far.
The past 12 days of 2013 have been full, stretching and exhilarating.
Friendships have grown. Ministry has been developing. Fellowship has blossomed. Relationships have been poured into. Work has been stimulating. Marriage has been engaging and blessed.
But today?
I need some rest.
But what does rest look like? I think that depends on what part of your person-hood needs the rest. Is it physical rest you need? Or is it emotional? Spiritual?
For me, I often hit the point where I need rest in all three areas at once. Usually when I've depleted one area, I rely on another area to sustain me - depleting that area as well. Then, when I've exhausted all three, I admit to myself that it's time for some rest.
Some intentional, introverted, all-by-myself rest.
So for me, today, rest looks like sleeping in until 10:00 am and laying in bed until the need for caffeine takes over. Pouring myself a cup of coffee, sitting back in bed and surrounding myself with the items that help me process and rest spiritually and emotionally.
Sitting in bed surrounded by my new, super comfortable 50% off pillows, with the heater up and the window cracked open to let in fresh light and cool air. (physical rest)
Journal and pen nearby. Computer laying ahead of me. Sometimes writing, sometimes just knowing it's near if I want to write to process more thoughts. (emotional rest)
Bible lying next to me, open to one of the 4 books I am studying right now. Lying available for me to read or to set back down as needed. (spiritual rest)
This is what rest looks like for me today.
I'll get out of my pink pajamas and boot slippers eventually. At some point the laundry will get put away and the vacuuming will be done.
But until I am physically, emotionally and spiritually filled again - I will rest.
The past 12 days of 2013 have been full, stretching and exhilarating.
Friendships have grown. Ministry has been developing. Fellowship has blossomed. Relationships have been poured into. Work has been stimulating. Marriage has been engaging and blessed.
But today?
I need some rest.
But what does rest look like? I think that depends on what part of your person-hood needs the rest. Is it physical rest you need? Or is it emotional? Spiritual?
For me, I often hit the point where I need rest in all three areas at once. Usually when I've depleted one area, I rely on another area to sustain me - depleting that area as well. Then, when I've exhausted all three, I admit to myself that it's time for some rest.
Some intentional, introverted, all-by-myself rest.
So for me, today, rest looks like sleeping in until 10:00 am and laying in bed until the need for caffeine takes over. Pouring myself a cup of coffee, sitting back in bed and surrounding myself with the items that help me process and rest spiritually and emotionally.
Sitting in bed surrounded by my new, super comfortable 50% off pillows, with the heater up and the window cracked open to let in fresh light and cool air. (physical rest)
Journal and pen nearby. Computer laying ahead of me. Sometimes writing, sometimes just knowing it's near if I want to write to process more thoughts. (emotional rest)
Bible lying next to me, open to one of the 4 books I am studying right now. Lying available for me to read or to set back down as needed. (spiritual rest)
This is what rest looks like for me today.
I'll get out of my pink pajamas and boot slippers eventually. At some point the laundry will get put away and the vacuuming will be done.
But until I am physically, emotionally and spiritually filled again - I will rest.
Monday, January 7, 2013
One Word 365 - Faith
I love how God always seems to choose my yearly "OneWord" for me.
On New Year's Even in 2010, I had already chosen a word to focus on for 2011 and a few hours before midnight, I could sense that God was changing it to something I never would of thought of. "Warrior."
That was an amazing year of getting over fears and gaining courage and strength in the Lord.
In 2012, I focused on the word "Joy."
Initially I didn't really want that word, but I knew that God was calling me to it. How glad I am now! I learned so much this year about the true meaning of the word Joy and where it's source is! I already knew this intellectually as a Christian, but this year I have come to know inwardly that our Joy is truly not dependent on circumstances. When we find our delight in the Lord, our Joy is unshakable because He is unchangeable.
This year, 2013, I feel God calling me to the word, "Faith."
It was a few days before the end of the year and I had been asking God what my word should be. As I was driving to do an errand, I was listening to the book of Hebrews. When it got to chapter 11, "The Hall of Faith" my spirit quickened - "That's it!"
Then I remembered back to a couple months ago when a word of knowledge had been given to me at a Bible Study one night...
Just a simple word that God wanted to increase my faith.
2013 is a really good year for some faith building. My husband and I are involved in a church plant in Orange County right now and every step is building and stretching our faith. It is most likely the most exciting time of my life thus far and as I am seeing God move within His body I am being so stretched and called to more faith in who He is, in His power, and to who we are called to be in Him.
I also have personal dreams and desires that I have been seeking God about and I want to learn to have my faith in Jesus and in His perfect will rather than in my desire for my own dreams to be fulfilled.
I am excited to watch as God does His work in me this year. For two years now, I have seen the Holy Spirit be so faithful as He has called me to a certain focus and then has done all the work in my heart.
My job this year is to obey.
I must use the skills I learned when I focused on being a "Warrior" and not let fear hold me back from anything Jesus calls me to in 2013.
I must remember the formation of Joy - that no matter what happens this year, my Joy is not dependent on what is seen circumstantially but on what I know to be true of Jesus Christ and the loving and holy character of God.
I am ready to grow.
I am ready to be stretched.
I am ready to Jump out in Faith.
Also - I'm putting together a "Faith 2013" playlist to be listening to this year - any suggestions for good songs on faith - please put them in the comments!
Here's one song I'm loving everyday:
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
4th Quarter Challenge
The Word of God is amazing.
Yes, I am talking about the BIBLE.
It is SO awesome.
I have always enjoyed sitting and reading my Bible. Of course, I'm just like any other Christian who has had their seasons of not reading diligently, or not have a desire to read for a long-ish period of time, but overall, I enjoy sitting (when I discipline myself to do it) and reading the Word.
But I have never read the Bible cover-to-cover, beginning to end. I'm sure at this point in my Christian walk, I've read most of it. But there was so much, especially in the Old Testament, that still seemed foreign to me.
In June of this year, I decided to read the Bible straight through in a year. I was doing well until I hit the middle of Leviticus. Yep, that's where it gets really hard to keep plowing through. So I basically stopped reading (except for my devotional reading) until a few weeks ago when our church announced the 4th Quarter Challenge.
The challenge is simple: read through the Bible in the last quarter of the year.
The whole Bible in 3 months.
Ya, right.
But then my husband started doing it and I didn't want to be left out. Plus, I already had the first couple books under my belt from the summer.
Now, I can't stop. I LOVE it.
I'm super thankful for the iphone app Bible.is because it allows me to listen to most of my reading while I'm running reports at work or while I'm driving. And I get a lot out of listening because it slows me down and makes me hear e.v.e.r.y word.
Being immersed in the Word is changing me. It is giving me a better understanding of God's character - His Holiness and Righteous - and the more I learn about the Old Testament the more I am blown away by His Grace and His mercy!
The Word is a mirror that reveals our soul and our utter sinfulness as mankind. But this makes me evermore grateful for the steadfast love of our Savior who has chosen to love me and bestow completely undeserved grace on me! The more I read about God's righteousness through His Word, I can't believe His great love in choosing to call me as one of His children. And that it what makes me fall in awe at the feet of His Grace.
His Word is making me fall more and more in love with Him.
It makes me think of the words of the chorus of one of my favorites songs:
Give me Jesus.
Give me Jesus,
Give me Jesus,
You can have ALL this world,
but give me Jesus.
All I want in this life is Jesus and I can't wait for Heaven so that I can just be in His presence forever!
Yes, I am talking about the BIBLE.
It is SO awesome.
I have always enjoyed sitting and reading my Bible. Of course, I'm just like any other Christian who has had their seasons of not reading diligently, or not have a desire to read for a long-ish period of time, but overall, I enjoy sitting (when I discipline myself to do it) and reading the Word.
But I have never read the Bible cover-to-cover, beginning to end. I'm sure at this point in my Christian walk, I've read most of it. But there was so much, especially in the Old Testament, that still seemed foreign to me.
In June of this year, I decided to read the Bible straight through in a year. I was doing well until I hit the middle of Leviticus. Yep, that's where it gets really hard to keep plowing through. So I basically stopped reading (except for my devotional reading) until a few weeks ago when our church announced the 4th Quarter Challenge.
The challenge is simple: read through the Bible in the last quarter of the year.
The whole Bible in 3 months.
Ya, right.
But then my husband started doing it and I didn't want to be left out. Plus, I already had the first couple books under my belt from the summer.
Now, I can't stop. I LOVE it.
I'm super thankful for the iphone app Bible.is because it allows me to listen to most of my reading while I'm running reports at work or while I'm driving. And I get a lot out of listening because it slows me down and makes me hear e.v.e.r.y word.
Being immersed in the Word is changing me. It is giving me a better understanding of God's character - His Holiness and Righteous - and the more I learn about the Old Testament the more I am blown away by His Grace and His mercy!
The Word is a mirror that reveals our soul and our utter sinfulness as mankind. But this makes me evermore grateful for the steadfast love of our Savior who has chosen to love me and bestow completely undeserved grace on me! The more I read about God's righteousness through His Word, I can't believe His great love in choosing to call me as one of His children. And that it what makes me fall in awe at the feet of His Grace.
His Word is making me fall more and more in love with Him.
It makes me think of the words of the chorus of one of my favorites songs:
Give me Jesus.
Give me Jesus,
Give me Jesus,
You can have ALL this world,
but give me Jesus.
All I want in this life is Jesus and I can't wait for Heaven so that I can just be in His presence forever!
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Fullness of JOY
Without you,
Jesus, I would have no joy in the sunset.
Without you, I would find no happiness in in any possessions; No latest item of fashion or
car or house would fill me.
Without you,
my soul would be a vacuum, craving and feeding - craving and feeding, but never feeling full.
It is
because You are my God that I take pleasure in this life.
It is
because this world is NOT my final home and is not my true dwelling place, that I
can take joy in living here on earth.
It is
because I know the Creator of the sun and the waves and the sand, that I can
delight in a love for the ocean.
It is
because I know You!!!
Lord, when I
don’t feel you near me, when I lose sight of who I am in You, not even my
favorite things satisfy me. When I have
forgotten my understanding of what You have given me, now and eternally, my
heart hardens and life becomes dull.
But Lord! Oh
Lord! When you give me the sweetness of
Your presence no circumstances around me matter! I could delight in your presence in the midst
of construction, at the edge of the waves, or in the front seat of my car. Nothing is sweet than those glimpses of
eternity, nothing is sweet than knowing You!
It is
knowing You that brings me joy during my times of prosperity. When my troubles lesson and when provision is
generous, I glory in the pleasures You allow me because they are gifts from You. A dinner out
with my husband, a new dress, a fresh bouquet of flowers on the table – these are
all expressions of my love for You – of who I have been made to be – an unique expression
of Your image.
It is
knowing You that brings me hope in more uncertain times. It is understanding that I have been created
in Your image, that You have called me as Your child, and that I have an
inheritance as a daughter of God Most High that brings me purpose. It is knowing this to be my destiny that
allows me to submit in leaner times and to still delight in Your presence.
Lord Jesus,
God Most High! Worthy are You and all
Your works! In every season of my life,
may my lips always utter praise!
Yes,
Lord. Yes, Lord! In Your presence there is truly fullness of JOY.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
It Comes In Waves
Everything is fine again! Life is so lovely, summer is just stretching her legs, and the sun has been smiling.
New friends are being made, new hearts being discovered, and new joy showing itself to me.
I’ve been reconnecting to old friends, discovering the richness of being known, and discovering the beauty of receiving.
God is good and life is beautiful.
And so I thought I was done grieving.
I found out I’m not.
It hit me tonight in the quiet – when I could no longer hide in the noise.
I usually relish my quiet space. I plan my time alone to the fullest with the things I want to do to recharge my soul, spiritually and practically.
But in the past two days of complete quiet after work, with Adam gone at networking meetings and not a single sound in the house except the buzz of the refrigerator and the hum of the air conditioning, I’ve had a complete lack of desire for anything.
Folding one basket of laundry is so difficult that I can’t deal with the other overflowing basket. I put it back against the wall. I pull into the gym parking lot and can’t make myself walk inside. I even go to one of my favorite Starbucks in Laguna Beach and I just want to leave. I really just want to be home and sit.
And finally, after two days of resisting the quiet with attempted chores and lots of iPhone app surfing and lots of attempted life planning, I finally went to the corner spot of the couch and just sat there.
And then it came.
The second wave of grief for the baby I lost 3 weeks ago. The baby I buried with Adam outside the window where I type these words. The baby I was able to see and hold at only six and a half weeks.
A baby who had a visible brain and spinal cord. A baby whose arms were budding and whose eyes were visible.
A baby who, for a little while, I had given life to. And a baby who was taken home even earlier than it’s sibling two and half years ago.
And so I sit here, for the second time in three years, grieving how two unplanned joys have turned into two of the biggest heartaches I’ve ever known.
And as I sit here, I'm hoping that this isn’t all I will ever know of motherhood.
New friends are being made, new hearts being discovered, and new joy showing itself to me.
I’ve been reconnecting to old friends, discovering the richness of being known, and discovering the beauty of receiving.
God is good and life is beautiful.
And so I thought I was done grieving.
I found out I’m not.
It hit me tonight in the quiet – when I could no longer hide in the noise.
I usually relish my quiet space. I plan my time alone to the fullest with the things I want to do to recharge my soul, spiritually and practically.
But in the past two days of complete quiet after work, with Adam gone at networking meetings and not a single sound in the house except the buzz of the refrigerator and the hum of the air conditioning, I’ve had a complete lack of desire for anything.
Folding one basket of laundry is so difficult that I can’t deal with the other overflowing basket. I put it back against the wall. I pull into the gym parking lot and can’t make myself walk inside. I even go to one of my favorite Starbucks in Laguna Beach and I just want to leave. I really just want to be home and sit.
And finally, after two days of resisting the quiet with attempted chores and lots of iPhone app surfing and lots of attempted life planning, I finally went to the corner spot of the couch and just sat there.
And then it came.
The second wave of grief for the baby I lost 3 weeks ago. The baby I buried with Adam outside the window where I type these words. The baby I was able to see and hold at only six and a half weeks.
A baby who had a visible brain and spinal cord. A baby whose arms were budding and whose eyes were visible.
A baby who, for a little while, I had given life to. And a baby who was taken home even earlier than it’s sibling two and half years ago.
And so I sit here, for the second time in three years, grieving how two unplanned joys have turned into two of the biggest heartaches I’ve ever known.
And as I sit here, I'm hoping that this isn’t all I will ever know of motherhood.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Walking as a Warrior
My year learning to be a Warrior has been a good one.
A GREAT one.
But the battle is tough.
My last post was about Playing it Hurt. I said it was time to start playing hurt, and by that I meant that I no longer wanted my fears to hold me back from getting in the game. The game of life, of relationships, of passions, or of my goals.
So, although I stopped writing about it for awhile, I DID get back in the game.
I've faced alot of fears this year - especially in the first six months of 2011. One of the biggest was that I worked up the nerve and courage to take an audition prep class, take a voice lesson and prepare for an audition into the Pacific Chorale - a professional Chorale whose concerts I have attended through the years.
I was so nervous - but I went. I followed through.
I tried.
And when I walked out of that audition, I had NO idea if I had a chance or not. But I was elated because I tried and fear had not won.
To me, that was the victory!
A week later, I received a voicemail saying that I had been accepted into the Chorale. Tears from out of the hidden places of heart lept out of my eyes - I kept thinking, "What if I hadn't tried? What if I kept listening to my fear?"
That is one example (and one of the bigger ones) of how I am allowing God to help me fight my fears.
But I am also learning that being a Warrior doesn't just mean facing fears.
It also means having vision.
And THAT is what I have been seeking for these last few months.
I know my purpose is to serve my King.
"But what, oh King, do you desire from me? Put vision into my soul of Your purposes for me, and give me the strength and character of heart to follow after that vision."
This is my prayer as I continue to seek to be His warrior.
A GREAT one.
But the battle is tough.
My last post was about Playing it Hurt. I said it was time to start playing hurt, and by that I meant that I no longer wanted my fears to hold me back from getting in the game. The game of life, of relationships, of passions, or of my goals.
So, although I stopped writing about it for awhile, I DID get back in the game.
I've faced alot of fears this year - especially in the first six months of 2011. One of the biggest was that I worked up the nerve and courage to take an audition prep class, take a voice lesson and prepare for an audition into the Pacific Chorale - a professional Chorale whose concerts I have attended through the years.
I was so nervous - but I went. I followed through.
I tried.
And when I walked out of that audition, I had NO idea if I had a chance or not. But I was elated because I tried and fear had not won.
To me, that was the victory!
A week later, I received a voicemail saying that I had been accepted into the Chorale. Tears from out of the hidden places of heart lept out of my eyes - I kept thinking, "What if I hadn't tried? What if I kept listening to my fear?"
That is one example (and one of the bigger ones) of how I am allowing God to help me fight my fears.
But I am also learning that being a Warrior doesn't just mean facing fears.
It also means having vision.
And THAT is what I have been seeking for these last few months.
I know my purpose is to serve my King.
"But what, oh King, do you desire from me? Put vision into my soul of Your purposes for me, and give me the strength and character of heart to follow after that vision."
This is my prayer as I continue to seek to be His warrior.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Playing Hurt.
The heart of a warrior is what I'm after. And this week, I've learned that the heart of a warrior must be honest and it must choose to be humble, even when it feels humiliating.
In the past few days, I've had to look at myself in the mirror and say, "This is what actually happened, Heidi. This is the real reason; this is what has been going on all along. Plain and simple - you're scared."
While reading a book for my creative writing class entitled, "The War of Art," I ran across a small paragraph. It was as if this small paragraph was a mirror that the book held up in order to show me myself.
The paragraph said this:
"What are we trying to heal, anyway? The athlete knows the day will never come when he wakes up pain-free. He has to play hurt."
He has to play hurt.
It was a wake-up to reality for me.
It was a kick-in-the-rear to stop blaming, stop rationalizing to myself, stop making excuses, and stop waiting for my emotional hurts to be all healed and fixed in order to move forward in something that I still want to do.
Maybe outside factors actually were a part of making one of my biggest joys turn into one of my biggest fears.
But a warrior can't always, if ever, choose the conditions in which he fights his battles. He must simply fight with no excuses. The conditions around him, or perhaps, even the conditions inside his own heart, may make things more difficult, but he still must choose to fight.
It's time for me to step up and start facing one of my biggest fears and not waiting until all the wounds are healed because waiting for complete healing has simply become an excuse for procrastination.
It's time to play hurt.
What about YOU? Do you ever rationalize your fears?
In the past few days, I've had to look at myself in the mirror and say, "This is what actually happened, Heidi. This is the real reason; this is what has been going on all along. Plain and simple - you're scared."
While reading a book for my creative writing class entitled, "The War of Art," I ran across a small paragraph. It was as if this small paragraph was a mirror that the book held up in order to show me myself.
The paragraph said this:
"What are we trying to heal, anyway? The athlete knows the day will never come when he wakes up pain-free. He has to play hurt."
He has to play hurt.
It was a wake-up to reality for me.
It was a kick-in-the-rear to stop blaming, stop rationalizing to myself, stop making excuses, and stop waiting for my emotional hurts to be all healed and fixed in order to move forward in something that I still want to do.
Maybe outside factors actually were a part of making one of my biggest joys turn into one of my biggest fears.
But a warrior can't always, if ever, choose the conditions in which he fights his battles. He must simply fight with no excuses. The conditions around him, or perhaps, even the conditions inside his own heart, may make things more difficult, but he still must choose to fight.
It's time for me to step up and start facing one of my biggest fears and not waiting until all the wounds are healed because waiting for complete healing has simply become an excuse for procrastination.
It's time to play hurt.
What about YOU? Do you ever rationalize your fears?
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Finishing Strong
I'm currently sitting at the curved, bamboo counter of the busy Starbucks on Main Street in Huntington Beach.
An empty cup, which ten minutes ago was filled with my tall-soy-chai-latte-with-no-foam, sits to my left.
To my right sits another individual fixated upon his laptop. He was just talking on his cell phone with someone in either Florida or Haiti...I couldn't pick up on the definitive details to determine which location it actually was. (Not that it was any of my business....)
I am writing a blog post right now but I should be writing a first-grade lesson plan. I am in the middle of my LAST college class and this week I am supposed to create a lesson plan to teach to 1st graders for the daily math and daily language. I'm looking forward to teaching the lesson and working with those adorable 1st graders that I've had chance to spend time with the last few Thursdays but I don't want to sit for an hour and type up all the formal explanations of what I will be doing in that half-hour of teaching.
I can hear my mom saying, "Dreading is worse than doing...."
I can hear my dad saying, "Finish Strong, Heidi! Finish strong!"
"You're right, Mom."
"I will, Dad."
Come on, Heidi. Just half a class left! Four more weeks of assignments and textbook readings and tests. Four more weeks of writing and proof-reading paragraphs and hitting the "submit" button to turn in my papers.
Four weeks to being DONE.
And just three months to walking across that field in cap and gown and receiving that slip of paper that documents my six-year pursuit of a college degree.
Three more months until I offically have a Bachelor of Science in Education.
I cannot wait.
Ok, I'm gonna get to writing that lesson plan now.
It's time to Finish Strong!
An empty cup, which ten minutes ago was filled with my tall-soy-chai-latte-with-no-foam, sits to my left.
To my right sits another individual fixated upon his laptop. He was just talking on his cell phone with someone in either Florida or Haiti...I couldn't pick up on the definitive details to determine which location it actually was. (Not that it was any of my business....)
I am writing a blog post right now but I should be writing a first-grade lesson plan. I am in the middle of my LAST college class and this week I am supposed to create a lesson plan to teach to 1st graders for the daily math and daily language. I'm looking forward to teaching the lesson and working with those adorable 1st graders that I've had chance to spend time with the last few Thursdays but I don't want to sit for an hour and type up all the formal explanations of what I will be doing in that half-hour of teaching.
I can hear my mom saying, "Dreading is worse than doing...."
I can hear my dad saying, "Finish Strong, Heidi! Finish strong!"
"You're right, Mom."
"I will, Dad."
Come on, Heidi. Just half a class left! Four more weeks of assignments and textbook readings and tests. Four more weeks of writing and proof-reading paragraphs and hitting the "submit" button to turn in my papers.
Four weeks to being DONE.
And just three months to walking across that field in cap and gown and receiving that slip of paper that documents my six-year pursuit of a college degree.
Three more months until I offically have a Bachelor of Science in Education.
I cannot wait.
Ok, I'm gonna get to writing that lesson plan now.
It's time to Finish Strong!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Returning...
It has been too long since I have posted!
It feels good to once again hit the "New Post" button and start typing in a blank text box.
Tonight, as it is 10:30, (and my original goal was to be asleep earlier than my normal 10:00 hour and be in bed by 9:30), will not be yielding an in-depth post.
However, I just had to come back to this little spot on the Internet after nearly a month.
Many lovely, lovely things have occured in my life! So many lessons to glean, stories to tell, and experiences to share. Some difficult and stretching experiences have occured as well and the lessons I continue to learn from those experiences always produce the gold that the furnace of the Refiner's fire promises.
2011 has truly been shaping up to be a year of training for me - the training of a Warrior. This One Word has truly proven to not be a mere idea but a true foundation for the work that God is doing in my heart and mind and life.
I think about how that word relates to my identity on a daily basis.
I have a growing playlist on my iPhone with songs that have themes of being a Christian Warrior (and I could always use new song suggestions!)
When confronted with decisions that make me want to hide, ignore, or pretend ignorance of a situation, I cannot escape the question in my head "What would a Warrior do?"
It's truly been a season of growing in strength. It seems, at least to me, that most of that has all been internal work. I'm not sure how much it shows externally in my attitudes and actions but I'm confident of the work taking place because I can feel my King is guiding me through it.
How has the beginning month-and-a-half of 2011 been going for YOU? Did you pick a OneWord for this year? Or do you see any themes taking shape in your life lately?
It feels good to once again hit the "New Post" button and start typing in a blank text box.
Tonight, as it is 10:30, (and my original goal was to be asleep earlier than my normal 10:00 hour and be in bed by 9:30), will not be yielding an in-depth post.
However, I just had to come back to this little spot on the Internet after nearly a month.
Many lovely, lovely things have occured in my life! So many lessons to glean, stories to tell, and experiences to share. Some difficult and stretching experiences have occured as well and the lessons I continue to learn from those experiences always produce the gold that the furnace of the Refiner's fire promises.
2011 has truly been shaping up to be a year of training for me - the training of a Warrior. This One Word has truly proven to not be a mere idea but a true foundation for the work that God is doing in my heart and mind and life.
I think about how that word relates to my identity on a daily basis.
I have a growing playlist on my iPhone with songs that have themes of being a Christian Warrior (and I could always use new song suggestions!)
When confronted with decisions that make me want to hide, ignore, or pretend ignorance of a situation, I cannot escape the question in my head "What would a Warrior do?"
It's truly been a season of growing in strength. It seems, at least to me, that most of that has all been internal work. I'm not sure how much it shows externally in my attitudes and actions but I'm confident of the work taking place because I can feel my King is guiding me through it.
How has the beginning month-and-a-half of 2011 been going for YOU? Did you pick a OneWord for this year? Or do you see any themes taking shape in your life lately?
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Perfect Love.
You see the tall, leafy tree.
You see the flowers blooming on the bush.
You see the ivy creeping farther and farther up the old building.
What holds these plants in place?
The Roots.
Where do these plants originate from?
The Seed.
..........
You feel the stress of an impending occasion.
You feel the anger at other people's choices.
You carry the burden of other individual's responsibilities.
What keeps the anxiety-producing burdens attached to you?
The Roots of Bondage.
What produced these anxiety-producing burdens that are held to you by the roots of bondage?
The Seed of Fear.
Out of the seed of fear comes destructive habits or patterns of thinking, anxiety, anger, and a host of other burdens that grow and attach themselves to your heart through the entangling roots of bondage.
These roots can feel so strong and powerful that you feel you will never have any freedom from the burdens that they keep you attached to.
In all your efforts of strength, you try to release your burdens, forget your anxieties, and calm your anger. But just as a weed grows back wtih more vengence when only the portion above ground is cut, your burdens quickly grow back and begin to strangle your hope for peace.
You know now that the only way to be released from these burdens is to completely uproot these roots of bondage that grew from the seed of fear.
You go to work at tearing out these roots only to find that you have made no significant progress, you are exhausted and left more vulnerable, and your burdens now seem even heavier to carry.
You are then handed two tools to help you rip out these strong roots. You unfold two scraps of paper and read these two phrases:
"The truth shall set you free..."
"Perfect love casts out all fear..."
You sit and stare at these two phrases. How can these familiar words work together in such a way to free you from these roots of bondage?
As you sit, the Holy Spirit give you this answer, "You must know this truth: That your burdens, anxieties, and the theft of your joy is being grown from the seed of fear. And you must know what specific fear it is. Let me reveal truth to you in order to make you free. I will show you the specific seed of fear that has been planted in your heart."
You allow Him to show you, and you are amazed to find that all the burdens you are carrying are growing from this specific fear - a fear you didn't realize you held!
You say to Him, "Holy Spirit, I had no idea this fear was in my heart. How do I uproot this fear when the roots of bondage are so strong?"
And He says back to you, "You can't do anything. You see, only perfect love casts out fear, and in your humanity you are far from perfect. You must trust Jesus with this fear. His love is perfect and He can provide real healing. But, be warned, although His healing is complete it is not devoid of pain. Are you willing to entrust your healing from this fear to His perfect love and His perfect methods?"
That is where your free will comes in; this is where you must decide to allow Him to heal you.
..........
That is what I must decide.
A specific fear was revealed to my heart today. And I desire to be freed from these roots of bondage that keep me carrying these burdens.
Now it comes down to surrender.
And so this is the earnest prayer of my heart,
"Lord Jesus, help me to trust You. You have called me to walk in victory over fear and live a life victoriously with joy! I give You this fear and I surrender my desire to avoid pain. I trust in Your perfect love and your perfect healing."
You see the flowers blooming on the bush.
You see the ivy creeping farther and farther up the old building.
What holds these plants in place?
The Roots.
Where do these plants originate from?
The Seed.
..........
You feel the stress of an impending occasion.
You feel the anger at other people's choices.
You carry the burden of other individual's responsibilities.
What keeps the anxiety-producing burdens attached to you?
The Roots of Bondage.
What produced these anxiety-producing burdens that are held to you by the roots of bondage?
The Seed of Fear.
Out of the seed of fear comes destructive habits or patterns of thinking, anxiety, anger, and a host of other burdens that grow and attach themselves to your heart through the entangling roots of bondage.
These roots can feel so strong and powerful that you feel you will never have any freedom from the burdens that they keep you attached to.
In all your efforts of strength, you try to release your burdens, forget your anxieties, and calm your anger. But just as a weed grows back wtih more vengence when only the portion above ground is cut, your burdens quickly grow back and begin to strangle your hope for peace.
You know now that the only way to be released from these burdens is to completely uproot these roots of bondage that grew from the seed of fear.
You go to work at tearing out these roots only to find that you have made no significant progress, you are exhausted and left more vulnerable, and your burdens now seem even heavier to carry.
You are then handed two tools to help you rip out these strong roots. You unfold two scraps of paper and read these two phrases:
"The truth shall set you free..."
"Perfect love casts out all fear..."
You sit and stare at these two phrases. How can these familiar words work together in such a way to free you from these roots of bondage?
As you sit, the Holy Spirit give you this answer, "You must know this truth: That your burdens, anxieties, and the theft of your joy is being grown from the seed of fear. And you must know what specific fear it is. Let me reveal truth to you in order to make you free. I will show you the specific seed of fear that has been planted in your heart."
You allow Him to show you, and you are amazed to find that all the burdens you are carrying are growing from this specific fear - a fear you didn't realize you held!
You say to Him, "Holy Spirit, I had no idea this fear was in my heart. How do I uproot this fear when the roots of bondage are so strong?"
And He says back to you, "You can't do anything. You see, only perfect love casts out fear, and in your humanity you are far from perfect. You must trust Jesus with this fear. His love is perfect and He can provide real healing. But, be warned, although His healing is complete it is not devoid of pain. Are you willing to entrust your healing from this fear to His perfect love and His perfect methods?"
That is where your free will comes in; this is where you must decide to allow Him to heal you.
..........
That is what I must decide.
A specific fear was revealed to my heart today. And I desire to be freed from these roots of bondage that keep me carrying these burdens.
Now it comes down to surrender.
And so this is the earnest prayer of my heart,
"Lord Jesus, help me to trust You. You have called me to walk in victory over fear and live a life victoriously with joy! I give You this fear and I surrender my desire to avoid pain. I trust in Your perfect love and your perfect healing."
Sunday, January 9, 2011
The Belt of Truth.
It happened.
The reason I was afraid to write my OneWord2011 post became reality and the fear I felt over publicly declaring the word "Warrior" over myself for 2011 took shape.
Doubt leading to defeat.
I finally wrote my OneWord post on Thursday; I was excited to move forward! Friday came - and it was awful. I felt utterly defeated. Everything in my emotional and spiritual self felt unable to cope with some new life circumstances, sudden sadness, and an increasing awareness of my own insecurities.
I felt like the exact opposite of a Warrior.
And it was through this experience on Friday that I have, once again, become increasingly aware of the fact that I have an enemy.
A few days in retrospect, it is obvious that instantly after I declared my intention to become a more focused and equipped warrior for the Kingdom of Heaven, the kingdom of darkness sent a little more attack my way, saying...
"Scare her off this journey before she builds up strength in Him. Hit her when she's unsuspecting and weak."
It was in this day-long battle that I realized the major importance of the weapon of Truth. Just as Ephesians 6:14 says,
"Stand, therefore, having girded your waist with Truth...."
Though it took me until the very end of that day to obtain any joy, I was able to at least be aware throughout the day that I was experiencing an inundation of lies and emotions. Therefore, I searched for truth and asked for God's strength to not let myself dwell in the lies.
So I am learning this:
A strong warrior must know the tactics of their enemy. And they must know what weapons to use as their defense.
I know that our King has given His warriors many weapons with which to fight, but currently, He is teaching this warrior-in-training the importance of
The Belt of Truth.
The reason I was afraid to write my OneWord2011 post became reality and the fear I felt over publicly declaring the word "Warrior" over myself for 2011 took shape.
Doubt leading to defeat.
I finally wrote my OneWord post on Thursday; I was excited to move forward! Friday came - and it was awful. I felt utterly defeated. Everything in my emotional and spiritual self felt unable to cope with some new life circumstances, sudden sadness, and an increasing awareness of my own insecurities.
I felt like the exact opposite of a Warrior.
And it was through this experience on Friday that I have, once again, become increasingly aware of the fact that I have an enemy.
A few days in retrospect, it is obvious that instantly after I declared my intention to become a more focused and equipped warrior for the Kingdom of Heaven, the kingdom of darkness sent a little more attack my way, saying...
"Scare her off this journey before she builds up strength in Him. Hit her when she's unsuspecting and weak."
It was in this day-long battle that I realized the major importance of the weapon of Truth. Just as Ephesians 6:14 says,
"Stand, therefore, having girded your waist with Truth...."
Though it took me until the very end of that day to obtain any joy, I was able to at least be aware throughout the day that I was experiencing an inundation of lies and emotions. Therefore, I searched for truth and asked for God's strength to not let myself dwell in the lies.
So I am learning this:
A strong warrior must know the tactics of their enemy. And they must know what weapons to use as their defense.
I know that our King has given His warriors many weapons with which to fight, but currently, He is teaching this warrior-in-training the importance of
The Belt of Truth.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
My OneWord2011.
"Warrior"
It seems a bit dramatic.
"Health" seems a little more practical, a little more sensible, and a little more normal.
And up until a few hours before we rang in the New Year, "Health" was going to be my One Word motto for the year.
But while celebrating with my family on New Year's Eve, my dad, sister, and I listened to music in a corner of my parent's house. And as I sat and listened, the songs that compared the Christian life to war began to stir my spirit.
It wasn't the first time that themes of war had begun to tug at me in December. During the last two weeks of the year, I saw the movies, "Voyage of the Dawn Treader" and "Legend of the Owls." I loved both movies because they held so much symbolism and I had enjoyed pondering what drew me so strongly to the noble heroes of each movie.
Also, during the last week of December, my husband began to read a book that has been sitting on our shelf for over a year - "Battle Ready" by Steve Farrar. Also in that week, I had read some excerpts from my parents copy of "Wild at Heart" by John Eldredge in which he often compares the Christian journey to battle.
So, as I sat and listened to these inspiring songs, I realized that all the recent media I had been exposed to was beginning to point to a specific direction.
I casually mentioned this to my dad and he said, "Well, maybe God's trying to show you something."
I smiled and tried to laugh it off. Themes of battles and war was the last direction I desired to take for this upcoming year. Especially after completing a year in which my One Word was "Healing."
However, the more I pondered the stirrings in my heart and the more I willingly opened my heart to asking God if He was leading those stirrings, the more I couldn't get away from the word, "Warrior."
Lord?! Me?? A Warrior?
But I'm a princess!
A gentle, golden-haired, dress-wearing, encourage-the-knight-and-send-him-off-to-battle-with-a-kiss princess!
Lord, You know how much fear I still hold in my heart, don't You? Most of the time, I don't act anything like a fearless warrior.
Are You sure??
I wrestled with these thoughts. Then I began to dwell upon the characteristics of a warrior. As I brainstormed a list of some of the trademarks a warrior is known for, my heart began to understand.
The list grew long but it included trademarks such as:
Courage
Wounds
Strength
Vision
Boldness
Leader.
As the list began to grow, I began to realize, "THIS is what He wants to do in me! This is what He wants to develop me into!"
And when I understood, I was overwhelmed.
And Excited.
This is what I want.
But this is what I am afraid of.
However, I am confident of this, that He did not give me a spirit of fear but one of boldness and a sound mind. I believe that He will finish the work that He has started in me and that He will show how His strength is made perfect in my weakness.
Here we go, 2011! Let's get started on this journey!
To find out what other bloggers are choosing as their word for 2011 click here!
Do YOU have any themes or words that you are inspired to follow after this year?
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
The New Year
It's taken me a few days to get settled into this New Year.
I spent the week before New Year's Day getting ready for 2011 with some journaling, reflecting, and planning.
I had chosen my word for OneWord2011 and I was excited about it.
And hours before the clock hit midnight, I felt God start stirring things up and changing things in my heart as I listened to some music at my family's gathering.
And it has taken me 5 days so far to get re-adjusted to my vision for this year. Or should I say, I have been re-adjusting to what I believe God's vision is for me this year.
I've been hesitating writing my post on what the One Word is that I believe God is calling me to for this year because when I write it down, there is no going back.
This word isn't what I expected but I know it's what I need.
Stay tuned.... :-)
I spent the week before New Year's Day getting ready for 2011 with some journaling, reflecting, and planning.
I had chosen my word for OneWord2011 and I was excited about it.
And hours before the clock hit midnight, I felt God start stirring things up and changing things in my heart as I listened to some music at my family's gathering.
And it has taken me 5 days so far to get re-adjusted to my vision for this year. Or should I say, I have been re-adjusting to what I believe God's vision is for me this year.
I've been hesitating writing my post on what the One Word is that I believe God is calling me to for this year because when I write it down, there is no going back.
This word isn't what I expected but I know it's what I need.
Stay tuned.... :-)
Monday, December 20, 2010
Permission to Myself.
Just RELAX, Heidi.
It's OK.
Just relax, and watch the rain outside your windows pouring down from the gray sky.
Just relax. Enjoy the sound of the rain hitting your roof as you sit on the couch.
Take in the scent of the cinnamon candle on your coffee table.
Allow yourself to stare at your red-and-green glowing Christmas tree. Remember where you bought each ornament. Chuckle at the memory of how you and Adam came to decide on a theme for your Christmas tree.
Notice the whir of the washing machine and dryer in the laundry room. Let it remind you that, even on your day off work, you have still accomplished some chores. Let that be a comfort to your mind which seems to think that you need to constantly be accomplishing something.
But please, do not let chores consume this day that was set aside for relaxing.
Heidi, your identity is not in how busy you are or how much you can accomplish.
It is okay to rest. It is okay to sit and to simply enjoy.
A day like this is so rare for you, Heidi. Don't waste it by tring to accomplish everything you can possbily think of.
Instead, find pleasure in the soft jazz Christmas music streaming over Pandora and enjoy the taste of your peppermint tea.
Do you want to close your eyes for a few moments and just half-sleep and half-listen to the music and the rain?
That's a lovely idea - go ahead,
it's ok.
It's OK.
Just relax, and watch the rain outside your windows pouring down from the gray sky.
Just relax. Enjoy the sound of the rain hitting your roof as you sit on the couch.
Take in the scent of the cinnamon candle on your coffee table.
Allow yourself to stare at your red-and-green glowing Christmas tree. Remember where you bought each ornament. Chuckle at the memory of how you and Adam came to decide on a theme for your Christmas tree.
Notice the whir of the washing machine and dryer in the laundry room. Let it remind you that, even on your day off work, you have still accomplished some chores. Let that be a comfort to your mind which seems to think that you need to constantly be accomplishing something.
But please, do not let chores consume this day that was set aside for relaxing.
Heidi, your identity is not in how busy you are or how much you can accomplish.
It is okay to rest. It is okay to sit and to simply enjoy.
A day like this is so rare for you, Heidi. Don't waste it by tring to accomplish everything you can possbily think of.
Instead, find pleasure in the soft jazz Christmas music streaming over Pandora and enjoy the taste of your peppermint tea.
Do you want to close your eyes for a few moments and just half-sleep and half-listen to the music and the rain?
That's a lovely idea - go ahead,
it's ok.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
A Gathering of November Blogs...
Happy Sunday Everyone!
I'm enjoying a nice quiet day with the Christmas tree glowing, the rain falling outside, a warm house with chores slowly getting done, an awesome workout this morning, and a sweet husband to hang out with.
I'm also getting a chance to read some good blogs...
One of the bloggers I follow, Elizabeth Esther, hosts a gathering of bloggers and their writings one Saturday out of every month. Here at this link, bloggers have all posted their favorite piece of their own writing from the month of the November. Click on over! It's a great chance to be exposed to lots of different blogs, topics, and writing styles!
Have fun exploring!
And enjoy your Sunday!
I'm enjoying a nice quiet day with the Christmas tree glowing, the rain falling outside, a warm house with chores slowly getting done, an awesome workout this morning, and a sweet husband to hang out with.
I'm also getting a chance to read some good blogs...
One of the bloggers I follow, Elizabeth Esther, hosts a gathering of bloggers and their writings one Saturday out of every month. Here at this link, bloggers have all posted their favorite piece of their own writing from the month of the November. Click on over! It's a great chance to be exposed to lots of different blogs, topics, and writing styles!
Have fun exploring!
And enjoy your Sunday!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Like A Floating Leaf.
Have you ever watched an autumn leaf fall off a tree?Each leaf's descent is different. It's transition from being attached to the tree to it's destination of lying on the ground is a space of unknown.
There are times when the air is still and a leaf falls rather directly from the tree to the ground.
There are other times when the wind is strong and from the moment the leaf becomes unattached to the tree to the moment it finally touches the ground, it is caught in a swirling journey.
It is tossed by the wind. It is sent high into the air and then it starts to drift downward only to be caught again in a gust that swirls it in circles. The leaf is taken far from the tree and then, eventually, it lands on the ground in a new location as the wind begins to subside.
But it does eventually land.
Transitions can be difficult, can't they?
Whether they are short or long periods of time, the feeling of being "unattached" to something or someone and to have not yet arrived to solid ground or to a solid understanding can feel confusing as if you are being carelessly tossed by the wind.
But the wind that blows upon our lives is NOT careless.
Jesus said in John 3:8 that, "The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear the sound of it, but cannot tell where it comes from or where it goes. So is everyone who is born of the Holy Spirit."
The Holy Spirit knows how He is guiding your transitions through these winds of change. He knows why He picked that moment to release you from what you were attached to and He knows where He is taking you next. His guiding can be mysterious and unpredictable, like a swirling wind, but it is also purposeful and trustworthy.
The next time you have the opportunity, watch a leaf take it's journey. Notice the contentment in it's travel. Notice the willingness that it embodies in each moment.
It is not fighting the wind. It is not resisting each sway of it's journey.
It floats, it yields, and it swirls with beauty. It gives joy to those that watch it's graceful motion.
The leaf does nothing except to yield. And then it simply rests and floats on the wind.
Are we willing to yield to the Holy Spirit as He brings us through transition? Let's trust that He knows where He is blowing the wind in our lives and let's make it our delight to enjoy each moment of the journey.
This post was inspired by a conversation that a friend and I had when she met me during my lunch break a few weeks ago. As we were talking about the transitions we find ourselves in and how we were trying to deal with them, we watched the leaves fall from the trees around us and we felt God speak to us.
What about YOU? Are YOU experiencing any transition?
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Post-Thanksgiving Post.
Well, life is back to normal. And for me, it happens to be a peaceful normal instead of the busy and stressed normal that I used to constantly find myself in. I am SO thankful for that.
My Thanksgiving Day was wonderful! Adam and I spent the day with his side of the family. We don't see the extended side of his family very often so I am always happy when I get a chance to see them and become more acquainted with that part of his family.
We also had a new treat this Thanksgiving. Adam's parents decided to "adopt" two Marines for the day from the base at Camp Pendleton. The city his parents live in puts together a whole event for these young soldiers - most of whom are having their first Thanksgiving away from family. It was so nice getting to know about these boys families and hear what military training has been like for them. That have quite the stories to tell! A wonderful blessing was to discover that both our marines were Christians and it was amazing to hear how God has been working in their lives while in training.
The Day-After-Thanksgiving was wonderful as well. The day-after-Thanksgiving has become a very important holiday in my family. We have TONS of traditions which include (but are not limited to) bagels, Starbucks, Hide-and-Go-Seek at the Christmas tree farm, decorating my parents house, TONS of pictures and filming, first sip of eggnog, teddy-bear ornament name draw, and the list goes on....
We had an amazing day and decided to finish the evening by watching some recently converted-to-DVD home videos. So Fun!
The picture is of me and Adam at the Christmas Tree Farm.
The long weekend ended with the grand finale of my sister's Junior Voice Recital. She is a vocal major at Long Beach State and is So. Incredibly. Talented. She was incredible! It was an hour of music sung just by her (well, one guy sang a duet with her) and she did an amazing job. She sang in a beautiful old chapel in Los Angeles and her voice left me with chills and tears throughout her whole performance. Her encore, "Great is Thy Faithfulness" was dedicated to our grandparents and she left the audience in rapture. I had the privilege of being the recital announcer which was fun until it resulted in my most embarrassing moment EVER. I don't think my cheeks have ever been so red!
All-in-all, an incredible weekend. What is also incredible is that, because of the peace I am experiencing in my daily life, I'm not too sad about watching a holiday pass. It was fun and wonderful and memories were made, but I am also enjoying the quiet and the calm of my daily life. I am thankful that I am learning how to have boundaries and to order my days in a healthy way for myself. That is something I am definitely thankful for during this post-Thanksgiving week.
What about YOU? How was your weekend?
My Thanksgiving Day was wonderful! Adam and I spent the day with his side of the family. We don't see the extended side of his family very often so I am always happy when I get a chance to see them and become more acquainted with that part of his family.
We also had a new treat this Thanksgiving. Adam's parents decided to "adopt" two Marines for the day from the base at Camp Pendleton. The city his parents live in puts together a whole event for these young soldiers - most of whom are having their first Thanksgiving away from family. It was so nice getting to know about these boys families and hear what military training has been like for them. That have quite the stories to tell! A wonderful blessing was to discover that both our marines were Christians and it was amazing to hear how God has been working in their lives while in training.
The Day-After-Thanksgiving was wonderful as well. The day-after-Thanksgiving has become a very important holiday in my family. We have TONS of traditions which include (but are not limited to) bagels, Starbucks, Hide-and-Go-Seek at the Christmas tree farm, decorating my parents house, TONS of pictures and filming, first sip of eggnog, teddy-bear ornament name draw, and the list goes on....
We had an amazing day and decided to finish the evening by watching some recently converted-to-DVD home videos. So Fun!
The picture is of me and Adam at the Christmas Tree Farm.
The long weekend ended with the grand finale of my sister's Junior Voice Recital. She is a vocal major at Long Beach State and is So. Incredibly. Talented. She was incredible! It was an hour of music sung just by her (well, one guy sang a duet with her) and she did an amazing job. She sang in a beautiful old chapel in Los Angeles and her voice left me with chills and tears throughout her whole performance. Her encore, "Great is Thy Faithfulness" was dedicated to our grandparents and she left the audience in rapture. I had the privilege of being the recital announcer which was fun until it resulted in my most embarrassing moment EVER. I don't think my cheeks have ever been so red!
All-in-all, an incredible weekend. What is also incredible is that, because of the peace I am experiencing in my daily life, I'm not too sad about watching a holiday pass. It was fun and wonderful and memories were made, but I am also enjoying the quiet and the calm of my daily life. I am thankful that I am learning how to have boundaries and to order my days in a healthy way for myself. That is something I am definitely thankful for during this post-Thanksgiving week.
What about YOU? How was your weekend?
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