God is realigning my heart.
I know it is Him because my human heart does NOT naturally think the thoughts I have been beginning to think in the past few days.
My heart has been revisiting the concept of willingness to literally go where God sends me. Whether He is sending me across the room to apologize to my husband, or whether He is sending me to Uganda to hold 3 little children in my lap, I want to be willing to go.
I really do not know where God will take me in my life. Honestly.
I am not writing this post with any clue or hint of where I might be going in order to follow God’s will. (And to my family who reads this blog…NO. This is not my indirect way of telling you I am moving to Africa. :-)
Part of the reason that my heart closes off to being willing to “give up my life” to follow Jesus is that I want to LIVE! I want to live, and thrive, and flourish! If I give God a willing heart, what if He makes me sacrifice all that I hold dear?
My husband said something so powerful to me the other night. He said, “The reason it is hard is because we were created to thrive. We were created to live! But we aren’t home yet…real life hasn’t even begun.”
Jesus said, “He who seeks to gain his life, will lose it. But he who loses his life, will find it.”
What if I was willing to give all my desires, my dreams, and my securities for God to rearrange as He desired? What if my life looks nothing like I originally intended it to look?
I have ETERNITY to live!
Think about it.
Eternity in Perfection.
No sin, no pain, no separation from love.
Think about this ratio: Giving up six months of your life here on earth in order to live 75 years of doing exactly what you want to do. Wouldn't 75 years be well worth the six months of sacrifice?
Now think of 90 years compared to 1 million years. Compare 90 years to 1 billion years. To a trillion. To FOREVER..............
I know. My mind can’t wrap around it either.
Do you believe this???
Do you believe that you will live forever in the perfect presence of your Savior?
Are you living like you believe it?
Or are you living like this life is all you’ve got?
I am asking myself the same questions.
But I know Jesus has more for us. I know He has more for me.
I’ll be honest. I’m a little scared to start heading down the road of opening my heart to complete willingness.
But even more than scared, I’m excited.
His Love, the entire essence of who He is, is too entrancing for me to ignore.
Next time you are in church and the song "I Surrender All" starts to play, ask your heart if you really mean the words you are allowing your voice to sing. I will do the same. I promise.
"All to Jesus, I surrender. All to Him, I freely give. I will ever love and trust Him. In His presence daily live. I surrender all. I surrender all. All to thee my blessed Savior, I surrender all."